F.A.I.L = Fundamental Actions in Learning

How to Fail Better and Pace Yourself for Success

On occasion, the thought of ending some of my workouts a set or two short pops into my head.

The other day was one of those affairs.

I was resting from a very intense tri-set, where I was hitting and sustaining my VO2 max during the set of exercises (fifteen lateral burpees over a dumbbell, ten chin ups and fifteen more burpees). Afterwards I was breathless.

I value a nice recovery period, but I had to regain my composure in a timely manner, because I wasn’t done. As I complete a set, I make a tally of it on my workout script. Looking at the notepaper, which was losing its composition due to the sweat from my hand dripping down upon it, I knew that I still had to repeat this grueling sequence three more times. By the second to last set, I was absolutely euphoric, albeit exhausted.

I’m not a true adrenaline junkie (a lot of rational and absurd things scare me, and I generally avoid dangerous and arduous situations), but when it comes to my workouts, the more intense they get, the more I’m champing at the bit to get on with it! I am further drawn in by the aforementioned euphoria, which is both a physical and metaphorical feeling, and the potent, tangible sensation known as “the pump” (see: “Pumping Poetic”).

In fitness training we have a word for working ourselves into downright exhaustion: failure. It may seem like a contradictory term when applying it to something that is universally viewed as productive and beneficial to our health and wellness. In this case, working to failure means doing reps of movement over and over until you physically can't do another. But failure in the sense of its more universally understood meaning, a lack of success, is even more pertinent to making gains.

The idea that failure is beneficial to growth is a key component of education, and learning is intrinsic to exercising. By taking on something that’s incredibly hard, we experience significant development just via the act of undertaking it. We might not be able to complete it on the first attempt. We may not even need to finish the task in order to reap the benefits of it. While we might have an outcome in mind, the result and intention behind doing something will almost certainly change during the process.

Whether it’s teaching students in a classroom or training people in the gym, there’s a tried and true method for measuring success. You’ve likely heard the phrase “process over product” being recited ad nauseam. Employing a going with the flow and adapting as needed method and mindset, enables us to be well rounded problem solvers. We can stand up to incredible challenges with a combination of mental and physical fortitude, which is obtained from the wisdom that comes with experience.

Doing something with a quantitative measurement of “success” can be detrimental to us actually succeeding, which is why it’s OK to not finish everything we’ve set out to do. This is certainly true for workouts. Although I think of finishing early, only to push myself to continue, there are times when I absolutely must call it quits for the day, even though my script says I have three more sets to do. Sometimes enough is enough. I am at the point in my training where I’ll gladly acknowledge that my body and mind knows when my breaking point is.

This is indicative of the learning process, rather than a sign of futility. In the past, I might have either unwisely continued, or quit and then felt sorry for myself. Doing either of these things is shattering to our cognition, psyche and physique. We can develop bad form and risk injury due to being mentally and physically fatigued, and establish poor self-esteem from unnecessarily admonishing ourselves.

As I was writing this post, I took a break to read over some other Substack pieces. I often do this as a way to refresh, but it’s also a great means for finding additional inspiration. And lo and behold, Nedra Glover Tawwab, author of

Nedra Nuggets

, published an article titled “You Don’t Have to Finish Everything You Start,” within which she writes: “This idea that we have to finish and move on to the next thing or we’re wasting or losing time is not always true. Sometimes we just need to pace ourselves. Sometimes it’s a matter of how far I can get.”

Pacing is one of the hardest, but most important elements of exercise. Some people resolve to start exercising because they think they’re going to see major gains immediately or in an unreasonably favorable time frame; only to call it quits when they don’t. I know I’ve just spent several paragraphs exemplifying how failure is a good thing, but this scenario is a clear example of how not finishing something is actually stifling growth and development.

Getting in shape is a marathon, not a sprint (although both literal activities are part of the endeavor). As I was well into my journey, I had to step back, be reflective of the process and learn to pace myself. I came to a very significant understanding that too much HIIT (see: “What is HIIT?”) can negate gains in other types of fitness routines like strength training, and vice versa. It’s all about setting a pace. After all, the goal of exercise should be to maintain a healthy lifestyle, which means being able to do it for years to come.

Doing something too hard and too fast is a gateway to experiencing emotional burnout and a steady progression of physical wear and tear. Exercise has taught me the value of being longevity minded. We have absolutely no control over certain outcomes in our lives, but pacing is generally something we have the authority to do. And loving ourselves is absolutely within our sovereignty. I am enjoying the process of exercising at a very high level now, while also learning to do it in a way that will allow me to enjoy it in the future. This means knowing when to quit while I am ahead.