I recently learned about the concept of premeditatio malorum from the ancient Greek philosophy of Stoicism. It involves contemplating all of the bad possibilities that may derive from a particular instance. With OCD, I have a tendency to hone in on the worst outcomes of a given situation, spurred on by a flood of irrational thoughts. My OCD is confoundingly at its worst when I am on top of my game. This is because when things are going well, intrusive thoughts typically rain on my parade (I can predict this downpour with far more certainty than a meteorologist can with the weather). OCD makes it hard to revel in the good times, because I’m always envisioning an impending catastrophe.
While I can interpret certain similarities between the irrational thoughts of OCD and premeditatio malorum, it would be a stretch to suggest that ancient Greek philosophers suffered from it. In fact, I think that some of their theories and methodologies can be applied to manage OCD.
Stoics adhered to what they considered to be the four virtues in everyday life: wisdom, courage, temperance or moderation, justice and living in accordance with nature. Participating in an exercise of ruminating on things that could go wrong or get taken away from us, helps us prepare for life's inexorable setbacks.
What’s in our control? What’s out of our control? What do we personally and collectively know? What’s unknown to us? These are both questions that the Stoics posed, and challenging inquiries that I’ve been presented with as part of my ongoing therapy. During a session, my therapist showed me an image of an infographic created by Jacqueline Rae Legard (@mindfulenough_).
My goal is learning to navigate unknown and uncontrollable circumstances, and find solace in these moments. Instead of feeling powerless and seeking reassurance that I’ll be OK; I’d like to be able to apply the following mindset in order to regain sovereignty: “Enjoy the good moment before it leaves and returns again.”
Sometimes life has a way of balancing itself out. But sometimes the good moments might not return, and that’s where premeditatio malorum may be helpful. Instead of catastrophizing or creating fantastical scenarios, I’d like to be able to respond to a concern in a rational and logical way, and avoid irrational thoughts and actions. So far, I am walking a tightrope between these two points. Oftentimes I trip and fall into the abyss of my OCD, but I’d be remiss not to give myself credit for the self-talk and mindful approach that I’m taking to quell it.
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Great post. I have also suffered with pure OCD - it's absolutely debilitating. I have recently found a few things that have helped: magnesium and 5HTP supplements, and The Power Of Now by Eckhart Tolle (the latter is the subject of my latest Substack post!). Hope your new stoic practice gives you some respite!
Yes. What is in your control? What do you give your energy to? How do you talk to yourself?
I find that graphic you shared very useful. We can spin our wheels worrying about those things outside our circle so easily!